The only thing you need to do to attract the one!

I meet many single women and talk to them as I am always curious what they struggle with and dream about. In those conversations I have discovered a disempowering pattern.

Sadly, many women still believe happiness comes with the right guy. They passively wait to become happy when they finally find the one. So by definition they are not so happy while they are single and hence they send the wrong vibes out which might not attract a wonderful, emotionally available, fun and mature guy.

I have discovered that to attract the man of your dreams (who by the way will never be as perfect as he is in your head!) you have to become happy first. You need to become happy with who you are, what you have and where you are at in life. You need to invite happiness in every area of your life before you invite your man.

Being happy is the most sexy and inviting quality you can show to a man while you are dating.

You see, men love being successful in everything they do. They want to feel like they are winning in a relationship with you by making you happy. They actually love making you happy as this makes them feel better about themselves. This task becomes much easier for them when they know you are a happy person already. Quality men feel pulled towards women who have a full and exciting life, who are happy and positive and who love themselves. It means less work for them, more fun and bigger chances of a happy relationship with you.

There is nothing more off putting than a woman who is miserable and unhappy about her life. The message which a man gets when you are in such low energy is: ‘I need a man now so he makes me happy and sorts my miserable life out’. No sane and emotionally intelligent man will want to commit to a woman like this. He knows on a very instinctive level that he will need to work very hard to keep you happy and succeed in a relationship with you.

Nobody wants to date miserable people. I am sure you wouldn’t like to go on a date with someone who would be moaning about his life either? And even if you end up on a date like this at the end you will feel overloaded and happy to go home really. This is not fun!

I want to also add that it is not about faking happiness. Everyone is allowed to have a bad day now and then, to have a little moan and get pissed off with life when things go wrong. I am talking about general attitude towards life. The attitude of being committed to bringing yourself to a happy place every day. You do it for yourself as you love living your life as a positive, radiant, joyful you.

Life will go wrong sometimes. You will get angry, frustrated, sad or even miserable on the occasion, but your job is to have a little moan, learn the lessons, shake it off and move onto a new adventure with a positive attitude.

If you are not entirely happy and you want to find the one my suggestion is – become happy first. Before you even start dating, assess your life and the way you live it and see which areas can be improved before you are happy with it. Maybe you want to lose weight, maybe you want a better job, and maybe you want to have more fun? Work on them now and don’t look for a rescuer who will miraculously resolve all your problems and unhappiness.

I want a great man for you. Someone who will love you, commit to you, make you happy, look after you, but to get all of these you need to first fall in love with yourself and your life, become happy with who you are, look after your own needs and commit to your happiness.

Happiness is sexy!

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